by Pastor James Kimathi
25th May 2025
About the Marriage Covenant
- The marriage covenant is a covenant between God and His people: God initiated marriage from the beginning, and for us to have an accurate understanding of what marriage is, we must understand the covenant. Matthew 19:5 states, “… For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh.”
From this, it is essential to note that many marriages do not last because of the quality of leaving. Leaving and cleaving come from a place of dependency. As such, a man should not extend the authority of his mother and father into his marriage.
In Africa, most of the family ties are cemented with those who are living. Conversely, a man and a woman ought to learn how to leave their father’s household. The leaving translates him from a boy to a man and her from a girl to a woman.
Those who have not left are still children and, thus, are obliged to obey their parents, as they are still within their parents’ premises and under their guidance. However, married couples who have left and cleaved are called to honour their parents, and this honour must carry substance. For instance, a girl who doesn’t have a husband can obey her parents, while on the other hand, a woman who is married is entitled to obey her husband. - The marriage covenant is initiated by sacrifice: Importantly, there can be no marriage covenant without a sacrifice, and there can be no sacrifice without blood. You should understand what the sacrifice is laid upon. Also, you cannot be a saint without being in a covenant with God through sacrifice. In Hebrew, sacrifice is cutting and involves the shedding of blood.
The Bible has a record of two covenants, well-known as the Old and New Testaments. All these covenants are established by sacrifice. Testament also means will, from the word willing. The will is activated by death, which is similar to the covenant. Wills are secrets, and covenants, too, are secrets. As such, you will never know what marriage is until you get into it.
Hebrews 9: 16 -32 states, “For where there is a testament, there must also of necessity be the death of the testator. For a testament is in force after men are dead, since it has no power at all while the testator lives. Therefore not even the first covenant was dedicated without blood. For when Moses had spoken every [a]precept to all the people according to the law, he took the blood of calves and goats, with water, scarlet wool, and hyssop, and sprinkled both the book itself and all the people, saying, “This is the blood of the covenant which God has commanded you.” Then likewise he sprinkled with blood both the tabernacle and all the vessels of the ministry. And according to the law almost all things are [b]purified with blood, and without shedding of blood there is no [c]remission.”
Thus, marriage is a covenant, a testament, and a will. In the case of a will, covenant, and testament, there must be proof of death, “being selfless.” That said, you cannot enter marriage unless you are dead. A marriage is thus a burial ceremony because a will is enforced.
A will is defined as a strong drive or an ambition from within. It is enforced when someone dies, and never takes effect when the one who signed it is still alive. Thus, there is no way one can enjoy marriage when still alive. In marriage, it is no longer your body but your husband’s or wife’s body.
The marriage covenant is founded on the marriage triangle, which does not have a base. There is nothing that goes between the man and the woman. Both man and woman depend on God, and thus, marriage is towards God. God is interwoven, and the two feed one another from God.
HOW IS THIS SACRIFICE ESTABLISHED IN A MARRIAGE COVENANT? GENESIS 15: 8-18
Everything God promises, He has a proof and an affirmation. For instance, how could Mary get pregnant while still a virgin? But the angel explained to Mary that the Holy Spirit would come upon her and the power of the Most High will overshadow her. Similarly, Abraham asked how Sarah would conceive, and God told him, “…Bring Me a three-year-old heifer, a three-year-old female goat, a three-year-old ram, a turtledove, and a young pigeon. (Genesis 15:9). Then Abram brought all these to God and cut them in two, down the middle, and placed each piece opposite the other. And when the vultures came down on the carcasses, Abram drove them away.
This portrays how covenant sacrifices are made biblically. And like Abraham, we need to learn how to drive the vultures away from the sacrifice. The new covenant is made under the sacrifice of the cross. The sacrifice on the cross is enough, and as such, it is paramount for us to learn how to keep the vultures away from the cross.
A promise and an oath seal the new covenant. That is why when God asked Abraham to take his son Isaac and sacrifice him, Abraham had no otherwise. These are the merits of the new covenant. In Christ Jesus, God has a covenant with us that what we ask in His name shall be provided to us. As a man, your wife should acknowledge that you can do anything for God.
God had to retain a remnant because of His covenant with Abraham, despite how the children of Israel behaved. According to Jeremiah 34:18-20, the only thing that gives us life is keeping the terms of the covenant. Besides, Genesis 15:8-18 shows that God moved amid the carcass that Abraham had cut into two. Marriage is thus the cutting of the carcass in between.
Marriage people should understand how to activate the repercussions of the covenant. For instance, a single person should be prudent when sleeping with a married man/woman. God becomes your enemy the moment you sleep around with married men/women. Consider the case of Abimelech.
Moreover, any time you sleep with someone’s husband/wife, you should consider yourself dead. This is why Christian believers should shun away from idolatry and fornication. The situation is much more complicated when married men sleep with married women.
In conclusion, we ought to understand that marriage is holy, and it should not be dealt with casually. Notably, some people do not die because they have finished the assignment but because they must die, and as such, some of them have signed their souls with the devil. Breaking the marriage covenant through sleeping around is a dead-dealing thing. No one should carry a dead-dealing spirit, and may mercy prevail unto us not to contract death-dealing sicknesses.
